Choose the Worst Movie: No Conclusion, Just Opinions!

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srowley75
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Post by srowley75 »

feaito wrote: I have many guilty pleasures courtesy of American International Pictures too.
We need to start a Grindhouse/Drive In department in the Films section. Most of the movies I've seen lately have been of this variety, and I'd enjoy exchanging titles and reviews with people.

I recently saw AIP's Unholy Rollers and enjoyed it. Wish they'd have made more movies about the glamorous sport that is/was roller derby. Personally, I found it more entertaining that pro wrestling ever was.

-Stephen
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moira finnie
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Poor George Sanders

Post by moira finnie »

Though I often try to find something enjoyable in just about any movie, the celebration of the birthday of George Sanders, on TCM must have been the result of a desire to show his lesser known films or leasing his better known movies must be getting tough to arrange. Some of his lamest films were, unfortunately, part of today's lineup. While I couldn't stand to watch more than a few minutes of most, one movie jumped out as highly amusing even though I knew it was pretty wretched.

Yes, there were a few small diamonds thrown in, such as Witness to Murder (1958) and The Whole Truth (1958), but if I'd never seen George before today's sparse feast, I might conclude that he was, well, a complete hack.

The disinterment of Dark Purpose (1964) and Good Times(1967), the first one of the most ineptly made pseudo-gothic Italian movies I've ever seen, and the second a Sonny and Cher flick that the less said about it, the better. I'm willing to draw a welcome veil over those unambitious movies that really should be made into guitar picks soon, but I'd like to mention the curious charms of ...not Solomon and Sheba (1959), even though it was sad more than bad, but this morning's Samson and Delilah (1949).

*Mild Spoilers Below* *Mild Spoilers Below*
I know that I probably don't appreciate the gift of De Mille for these types of extravaganzas, but this one was so hilariously bad--in a funny yet tedious way. It's not just the sick scene when Angela Lansbury is suddenly impaled, Victor Mature's wrasslin' with a stuffed lion or being blinded, but poor Hedy Lamarr had to look aroused by his struggle, not to mention the terrible job they did on her makeup for the color film, making her very beautiful face far older than it was in reality. Nor was it her "I'll never be hungry again" moment after all heck breaks loose at her sister's wedding reception (see below). Image

No, it was also the terrible dialogue, as in the following examples:

Hot chick to slavering pickup at the public humiliation of blind Samson in the arena as he is surrounded by dwarves who taunt him and nip at his leg with the jawbone of an ass: "What are they doing now?" she asks. He replies: "Spinning their web, my sweet". Do you really want to be dating a babe who's so dumb she can't figure out what's going on at this event? Isn't it obvious?

Samson: (of Delilah) Hold this fork-tongued adder before I put a heel on her.
Delilah: If you crush the life out of me I'd kiss you with my dying breath!

My favorite scene in *Samson & Delilah*? George Sanders as the Saran (Wrap?) of Gaza playing with his ant farm!

Therefore, I'd like to submit Samson and Delilah as another nominee for Worst Picture (in an entertaining, watchable and irreverent way).
_________________________________
George, as he should always be--suave, a bit sinister, but always interesting:
Image

Please, let's stick to the movies where George Sanders plays someone who might have brought some style to a world desperately short on it, somewhere between 1700 and the 1960s!
An Ideal George Sanders Birthday Tribute might include:
All About Eve
The Ghost and Mrs. Muir
The Private Affairs of Bel Ami
Call Me Madam
The Moon and Sixpence
Son of Fury
Man Hunt
Rage in Heaven
Foreign Correspondent
Rebecca
Confessions of a Nazi Spy
The Picture of Dorian Gray
Village of the Damned
This Land Is Mine

and almost nothing after 1960, alas.
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Re: Poor George Sanders

Post by Mr. Arkadin »

moirafinnie wrote: An Ideal George Sanders Birthday Tribute might include:
All About Eve
The Ghost and Mrs. Muir
The Private Affairs of Bel Ami
Call Me Madam
The Moon and Sixpence
Son of Fury
Man Hunt
Rage in Heaven
Foreign Correspondent
Rebecca
Confessions of a Nazi Spy
The Picture of Dorian Gray
Village of the Damned
This Land Is Mine

and almost nothing after 1960, alas.
What? No Viaggio in Italia (1953)?

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moira finnie
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Post by moira finnie »

Sure, Viaggio in Italia would be fine, but I've only seen half of it up till now! I should also have mentioned Lured (1947) and The Strange Affair of Uncle Harry (1946)
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srowley75
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Post by srowley75 »

Samson and Delilah is a great addition, Moira, and one that I wish I'd included.

DeMille reportedly wanted to cast Patrick Warburton prototype Steve Reeves as Samson, and considering the excess for which DeMille's films are renowned (especially his hypersexual biblical epics), Reeves seems an ideal casting choice. Apart from the occasional look of bemusement and a he-man bellow here and there, Reeves was never a very expressive actor, but audiences would've been thrilled seeing his bulging superhero body alongside sexpot Hedy Lamarr's.

I find the wildly idiosyncratic dialogue of DeMille's epics to be the highlight of those films. It's been a while since I've seen Samson, but Ten Commandments remains fresh in my mind ("Are her teeth white like sheep and her lips moist like pomegranetes?" etc.) and I'm sure Samson contains more overblown examples.

-Stephen
Last edited by srowley75 on July 7th, 2008, 11:54 am, edited 2 times in total.
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Post by movieman1957 »

Maybe "The Barbarian and The Geisha" not long after the other "classic" "The Conqueror." And I like John Wayne.

Throw in -

"2001 - A Space Odyssey"
"Man of La Mancha"

It may not have been bad but one of the most boring movies I rememeber watching was "The Moon and Sixpence."
Chris

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traceyk
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Post by traceyk »

Faster Pussycat! Kill, Kill!

Attack of the Crab People

Day of the Triffids

The last fourth or so of Tarzan the Ape Man--200 blood-thirsty midgets in black face and a really bad gorilla suit

Born to be Bad

Magnificent Obsession--I know a lot of people love this movie, but it makes no sense (the plotline, I mean)

Every Girl Should be Married--should be titled I Loved a Stalker

And even though I love Hepburn, I have to add Dragon Seed and Sea of Grass
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Post by Bogie »

Here's another one for you CASINO ROYALE, no no not the official Bond movie but the piece of crap film that Peter Sellers was in. I heard he was a pain in the butt throughout the entire production of the film as well.
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Post by CharlieT »

Mr. Arkadan mentioned David and Lisa and I agree that it was very boring. If I hadn't gotten in for free, I would have asked for my money back - of course, I was only 12 years old at the time, so it may have been a little bit over my head. :roll:

I'd like to nominate The Greatest Story Ever Told. It looked like someone said, "If you're famous in Hollywood, we'll find a role for you - even if it doesn't make a bit of sense (i.e. John Wayne as a Roman centurion.) And it has a Swedish Jesus! :shock:

King of Kings comes in a close second. Royal Dano never convinced me he was Peter and Harry Guardino's Barrabas can't hold a candle to Anthony Quinn's.
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srowley75
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Post by srowley75 »

traceyk wrote:Faster Pussycat! Kill, Kill!
From all I can tell, this one gets more and more respect from film historians and critics as the years go on. I think it's undeniably Russ Meyer's best, most accessible and most popular film, and probably the one that feminists would find the least offensive.

I almost fell out of my chair laughing the night Bob Osborne's guest programmer (can't remember who it was, though) chose this film as one of his picks, and Bob admitted that Russ Meyer had been a next door neighbor of his.
Every Girl Should Be Married
Have to admit that this is one of only a handful of Cary Grant pictures that I've not yet seen.

Quite frankly, I don't think I could name a title that so succinctly summarizes the 1950s attitude toward women.

-Stephen
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Post by moira finnie »

Apart from the unsurpassed beauty of Chopin's music, does anyone else think that A Song To Remember (1945) might be one of the worst biopics ever? Not so much because of Cornel Wilde, who is inoffensive, but due to the over-the-top performance of Paul Muni.
Image
Paul Muni, breathing down Cornel Wilde's neck every moment in this picture. And people thought George Sand was the cause of Chopin's early demise...

Jeez, if only someone--other than Bella, his amanuensis-wife--could have seen Muni's hamminess emerging every time he started to apply the spirit gum and whiskers, and convinced him to underplay, just a tad. He could be such a good actor at times, in I Am a Fugitive From a Chain Gang, Scarface, Black Fury, Counter-Attack, We Are Not Alone, and Angel On My Shoulder. He really needed a good script with a credible role, and a strong director such as Mervyn LeRoy. In last night's broadcast of Song To Remember on TCM, he was truly horrible. Man, when the good ones crash and burn, it makes one heckuva bonfire.
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Post by Bogie »

Darn and I missed it last night :(

Luckily it's showing again in late September. I refuse to believe that Paul Muni gave a bad performance! I love that guy. Yes, he could ham it up at times but I always found his work entertaining and worthwhile.

Oh well i'll have to give my impressions when I see it on the 22nd of Sept.
feaito

Post by feaito »

moirafinnie wrote:Apart from the unsurpassed beauty of Chopin's music, does anyone else think that A Song To Remember (1945) might be one of the worst biopics ever? Not so much because of Cornel Wilde, who is inoffensive, but due to the over-the-top performance of Paul Muni.
Image
Paul Muni, breathing down Cornel Wilde's neck every moment in this picture. And people thought George Sand was the cause of Chopin's early demise...

Jeez, if only someone--other than Bella, his amanuensis-wife--could have seen Muni's hamminess emerging every time he started to apply the spirit gum and whiskers, and convinced him to underplay, just a tad. He could be such a good actor at times, in I Am a Fugitive From a Chain Gang, Scarface, Black Fury, Counter-Attack, We Are Not Alone, and Angel On My Shoulder. He really needed a good script with a credible role, and a strong director such as Mervyn LeRoy. In last night's broadcast of Song To Remember on TCM, he was truly horrible. Man, when the good ones crash and burn, it makes one heckuva bonfire.
I watched "A Song to Remember" when I was a boy, so I'd have to see it from an adult's point of view to give an opinion, but from what I've read of this film and from what I can recall I think it could fit my idea of a "guilty pleasure"= a film that has entertainment value, but that it's not a a "quality" film or a really good one, but rather an artificially acted and scripted biography.

I remember reading that this one was an example of "schmaltz" or "kitsch" and that it has a "camp" appeal to it.

As you aptly say Moira, Cornel Wilde was "inoffensive" and Merle Oberon, when not handled by a good director like Wyler or Lubitsch, could be quite mediocre from a "thespian" point of view. I feel that her main assets were her beauty, charm and elegance. As for Muni I seem to recall her over-the-top performance a little bit :wink: .
klondike

Post by klondike »

Bogie wrote:Here's another one for you CASINO ROYALE, no no not the official Bond movie but the piece of crap film that Peter Sellers was in. I heard he was a pain in the butt throughout the entire production of the film as well.
Casino Royale (1967) was the joyous, grandiose earth-mother-ship of all lampoon films, a delight for the eye (at least on the big screen, or on a decent-size color television), and incidentally boasted one of the coolest, liveliest, most diverse soundtracks to be found in 60's films.
(Covered by artists like Mancini, Sergio Mendez, Herb Alpert, Astrid Gilberto, Andy Williams, et al.) 8)
Next to the more obscure The Magic Christian, it is also the single greatest repository of Peter Sellers' scathing, off-kilter wit & outside-the-box comedic style; even overlooking all the subtler inspirations in the two decades following, Mike Myers' Austin Powers films would likely never have been conceived without the groundwork laid by Sellers' work in Casino Royale! And if indeed Peter was a pain-in-the-bahookie during filming, I guess that would put him in the same company as Spencer Tracy, Bette Davis, Charlton Heston, Judy Garland, Marlon Brando, Kate Hepburn, Bob Mitchum & all those other tempermental artist-types.
Relative newcomers Ursula Andress & Woody Allen certainly didn't mind the broad exposure Casino afforded them, not to mention the wilder, fresher gigs it granted veteran troupers like David Nivens, Deborah Kerr, William Holden & Orson Welles.
Implying that '67's Casino Royale failed as a spy flick is rather like saying that Blazing Saddles doesn't stack up well next to other Westerns, or that Young Frankenstein just wasn't very scary! :x
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Post by moira finnie »

Well, it's been a hectic week, and I didn't get around to looking over the field of deep-dyed turkeys any earlier than today. Sorry. Below is a list of the movies that qualified as among the Worst Movies Ever Made (before 1970).

Could you please pick 5 as your top bad flicks?
Let's try running this for a week, okay?

A few worthy films, such as Beyond the Valley of the Dolls, The Adventurers & Zabriskie Point had to be thrown out of the contest, because they were released in 1970s, our arbitrary cut-off date. Maybe we can figure out those later turkeys in the near future. Why do you suppose so few of the bad movies we picked came from the 1930s?

Here's the rundown of movies to choose 5 "baddies" from:


3 Votes each for the following:
2001, A Space Odyssey (1968)
The Sound of Music (1965)

2 Votes each for the following:
David and Lisa (1962)
Last Year at Marienbad (1961)
Lawrence of Arabia (1962)
The Conqueror (1956)

1 Vote each for the following:
A Song to Remember (1945)
An Affair to Remember (1957)
Around the World in 80 Days (1956)
Arsenic and Old Lace (1944)
Attack of the Crab Monsters (1957)
Beach Blanket Bingo (1965)
Beach Party (1963)
Bikini Beach (1964)
Born to be Bad (1950)
Bye, Bye Birdie" (1962)
Casino Royale (1967)
Chastity (1969)
Che! (1969)
Cleopatra (1963)
Cuban Rebel Girls (1959)
Day of the Triffids (1962)
Doctor Zhivago (1965)
Dragon Seed (1944)
Duel in the Sun (1946)
Every Girl Should be Married (1948)
Faster Pussycat! Kill, Kill! (1965)
Female on the Beach (1955)
Forbidden Planet (1956)
Gentlemen's Agreement (1947)
Giant (1956)
Golden Dawn (1930)
Gone With the Wind (1939)
Hans Christian Anderson (1952)
How to Stuff a Wild Bikini (1965)
King of Kings (1961)
Magnificent Obsession (1954)
Mardi Gras" (1958)
Marnie (1964)
Miss V from Moscow (1942)
Muscle Beach Party (1964)
My Son John (1952)
Not So Dumb (1930)
Panic in Year Zero (1962)
Queen of Outer Space (1958)
Random Harvest (1942)
Samson and Delilah (1949)
Sea of Grass (1947)
Tarzan the Ape Man (1932)
The Barbarian and The Geisha (1958)
The Gang's All Here (1943)
The Greatest Show on Earth (1952)
The Greatest Story Ever Told (1965)
The Inn of the 6th Happiness (1958)
The Man With the X-Ray Eyes (1963)
The Oscar (1966)
The Producers (1968)
The Shanghai Gesture (1941)
Valley of the Dolls (1967)
Weekend (1967)
Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?" (1967)
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